A Tale for the Ages

At the beginning of your upkeep, if an opponent controls more lands than you, create a Treasure token. (It's an artifact with "T, Sacrifice this token: Add one mana of any color.") 2W: Choose another player. That player gains control of target Treasure you control. You draw a card.

Bargain (You may sacrifice an artifact, enchantment, or token as you cast this spell.) Target creature gets -3/-3 until end of turn. If this spell was bargained, that creature gets -5/-5 until end of turn instead.

1, Sacrifice this creature: Draw a card. Create a Sorcerer Role token attached to up to one other target creature you control. Activate only as a sorcery. (If you control another Role on it, put that one into the graveyard. Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 and has "Whenever this creature attacks, scry 1.")

When this creature enters, create a Cursed Role token attached to target creature you control. (If you control another Role on it, put that one into the graveyard. Enchanted creature is 1/1.)

Artifacts you control have "2, Sacrifice this artifact: It deals damage to any target equal to 1 plus the number of permanents named Food Fight you control."

This spell costs 1 less to cast for each creature that attacked this turn. Witchstalker Frenzy deals 5 damage to target creature.

Whenever this creature enters or attacks, mill three cards, then return a land card from your graveyard to the battlefield tapped. Activated abilities of lands you control cost 1 less to activate. Land creatures you control get +1/+1.

Target creature's owner puts it on their choice of the top or bottom of their library.